A Russian, a couple Canadians, a Swiss, a Minnesotan, a Californian, and a New Yorker walk into a bar… Ok, let me back up and start from the beginning.
As you may know, I have quite a few Snap Chat followers, but what’s amazing is how many I actually run into daily, even when I am traveling to the other side of the world. It's totally insane (to know) how many people are watching my life. Katie and I were constantly running into our followers while traveling through Europe this summer. And by the way, our followers happened to be some of the coolest people we met this summer. I loved meeting all of you!
This is a fan boy or shall I say cop story gone wrong. Lets just say Katie’s underage San Jose nightlife is no longer existent because this cop never got his “date” with me. Let me walk you through this sequence of crazy events that took place over a span of a few months.
You may know that Katie and I are from San Jose and we are big Shark fans. So while we were at a Sharks game, during an intermission, one of our followers approached us and asked if he could take a picture with us. We said sure and took a picture with him. He appeared to be in his mid 40's and mentioned he was a cop. I did think it was a little odd that he offered to buy Katie a beer, when he knew that she was only 17 at the time. We went back to our box and continued to cheer on our team.
Fast-forward a month. One of my friends, who is a Country Music Singer, was performing at a popular nightclub in San Jose. While waiting in line strategizing how I was going to get Katie into the bar, the cop approached us and said, “I know Katie’s not 21, I can help you get her in. Just follow after me.” I responded, “Oh cool, thanks!” Since I meet so many people, it took me a minute to process who he was. Then it dawned on me, he was the cop who wanted to take a photo with us at the Sharks game! So he took control of the situation and told us to separate. He waited with Katie and proceeded to get her right into the bar, immediately offering her alcohol. Because he helped us get in, I guess he thought he would be hanging with us all night… so he leeched on. He followed us everywhere. It got a bit obsessive and we both felt uncomfortable. Just when I thought he finally got the hint, he boldly asked me out on a date. In hopes that he would leave, I politely told him that I was sorry but I had a boyfriend. Not only did he NOT leave, but he seemed to get irritated, kind of even angry. He said, "I thought you were meeting some friends here." I replied, "I am when it's over."
Katie had enough of the creepy stalker cop so she bailed out and Ubered home. That left me by myself waiting for my friend's show to end, of course with you know who not leaving my side. He definitely was not getting the hint to leave or just did not give a shit. One or the other. As he noticed that I was getting annoyed, he said, "I can take you back stage and introduce you to the singer." I laughed and replied, "That's the friend I'm waiting for; we are going out after his show." I don't know why he was surprised. He took my arm and proceeded to walk me towards the backstage. I took a few steps with him then stopped and kind of shook my arm loose and said, “This is where I say goodnight. Thank you for the drink and thank you for helping Katie get in, but I need to go meet my friends now.”
OMG! You are not going to believe what happened next. He gets really mad and recklessly went up to my friend's tour bus and starts pounding on the door. I thought to myself, THIS GUY IS TOTALLY INSANE! I guess he felt empowered to do this because he is a "cop". Not a minute too soon, my friend walked up, gave me a hug and turned to the cop and said, "can I help you?" The cop just looked at me then looked at him and didn’t say anything and walked away. I thought my story would end right there, but noooo.
So Katie’s 18th birthday rolls around… and lets just say that was a night that won’t be forgotten. Of course we start the night by snap chatting us doing shots at my house and letting everyone know where we were going to be if they wanted to join us. Not thinking in a million years that creepy, old, stalker cop was watching. We then Ubered to Sino in Santana Row for Katie's birthday dinner. Half of the group showed up completely destroyed. (By the way when they ask for ID, I show them my passport and Katie shows them my Drivers License. It works every time.) We all drunkenly feasted on Kung pao tofu while snap chatting it all. When dinner ended we decided to continue this wild birthday celebration and took it to our favorite bar.
Things were totally getting crazy. Music blasting, dancing on the tables and pillow fights. And of course snap chatting it all. While Katie was dancing around getting chocolate covered strawberries fed to her, I was just kicking back filming her. I was looking down at my phone and when I looked up, my heart stopped. The creepy, old, stalker cop was standing right in front of me! He looked at me then turned his head slightly to watch the bartender stand on top of the bar and pour shots into Katie's mouth. I looked back down at my phone so I wouldn't have to make eye contact and when I looked back up he was gone. I thought oh great, dodged that bullet. But oh boy was I wrong. All of a sudden I was approached by the security guard and of course the off duty stalker cop. I was asked for my ID so I gladly handed them my passport. I was trying to signal Katie that they were on to our little trick, but it was too late… They stormed over to Katie and asked for her ID. She handed them my license. They escorted Katie out and the creepy, old, stalker cop kept my drivers license as a souvenir that night.
A couple days go by and Kelly, Katie, and I decide to get Katie a new ID because she has FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out). We called up my crazy aunt and she told us about a guy named “Fatboy” on the Eastside. We piled into my car and headed over to meet up with “Fatboy” the ID guy. We handed him the money and he took Katie’s picture against a Mickey D’s white wall. A couple hours later Katie became a New York resident, just in time for our move to Hollywood… And yes the ID was the wrong color. Lol
A Russian, a couple Canadians, a Swiss, a Minnesotaian, a Californian, and now a New Yorker walk into a bar and are greeted at the door by whom I’m sure you can guess… the stalker cop! Because of all of the drama regarding Katie and her ID situation we decided to go to a new bar and not announce what we were doing that night on Snapchat. Right as we approached the door, lo and behold, who’s standing there waiting for us?! It’s as if he had a tracker on our phones… looks like he’s like momma G and is tracking us through Find a Friend. He looks directly at Katie and says, “Hi Katie, I’ve been waiting for you.” Katie was speechless, turned around and left the line. The poor kid wasn’t even able to whip out her new New York ID. We all decided if Katie couldn’t get in that we would all leave and just head to another bar. That bar lost a lot of business that night ;)
The next day we moved to LA… not because of him though!
This past weekend I was back in San Jose visiting friends and family. I went to a local bar to meet up with a couple friends and of course I am greeted by the stalker cop who immediately said to me “Hi, where’s Katie?!” I looked at him, rolled my eyes, and asked him if he would like me to autograph my ID that’s he’s so closely holding on to. He chuckled and continued to lurk around. A lot more happened that night but we won’t get into that right now. ;)
I can’t seem to get rid of this one.. This past week it seemed like I was running into everyone! There are so many stories I want to share with you guys.., but honestly I have to wait till I’m around 40 years old to put the really juicy ones in my book ;) I live a crazy life.